Friday, January 23, 2009

Atheist Anwers to Christian Joy


The atheist lobby has come up with an answer to all the Christian joy and charitable activities that make them look so bad. The anxiety and worry of atheistic groups has risen sharply with a recent study showing that conservative Christians are decidedly more charitable than Liberal unbelievers. Despite their usually successful claims to the contrary, new studies by several neutral scientists proves conclusively that Conservative Christians live longer, have better marriages and better sex, and are generally happier than libs.

The atheist groups approached a Drug Laboratory in Moscow that was shut down after the fall of Communism. They asked the atheist scientists to develop some medicine that would suck the life and joy out of Christians so their lives of freedom and peace would not be so superior.

The scientists went to work and resurrected a drug developed under Stalins's rule that fit the bill. It is called, CEREBRUM and the enclosed video proves its effectiveness. If you or someone you love is suffering from high levels of fun, joy and reverie, get CEREBRUM today.
Ps. Satire alert!!!
Gary Sweeten

3 comments:

Michael W Cristiani said...

Gary,

Recently a facebook friend included me in a distribution list with other folks who, like my friend, are quite exercised about the election of Barack Obama, and the potentially perilous implications in the US and abroad for pre-born human beings. Many of the respondents seem to be uncharitable in their comments, but the following two comments from different posters seem to relate to your post here about Joy!

"Hmmmm...and since we know most Libs don't believe and therefore don't pray,we have the big advantage."

My reaction was, "How do you know most Liberals are unbelievers and therefore don't pray? Could that be right? And why is it necessary to find some advantage over "them", (like your athiests)?
I think the "we" was supposed to imply Believers who are Lifers. Not sure what the word "advantage" was intended to imply/convey. This is not a game, like tennis.

"That's why we should pray for the conversion of All to Jesus Christ, even though some will refuse. We don't know who they are but we should pray for all anyway."

Amen. Many who are Believers as yet see no disconnect with a pro-Abortion world view and the Lordship of Jesus Christ. Many pro-Life Believers share little else with Conservative Christians. Does the research show that those Believers who are pro-Life are happier/more Joyful, are more charitable, have better marriages/sex, and live longer?

When I read the second post, I thought perhaps this person has lived/received the Mercy and Boundless Love of God and knows that Grace and Faith are available to all. He was also agreeing that he thought most Libs are unbelievers, and offering his non-judgmental Rx for that.

All, in all, as I noted already, Believers I know (anecdotal evidence to be sure) of every stripe are happier and more joyful,etc., than those who claim they do not believe.

MANY BLESSINGS!
Peace and All Good!
Michael

Gary Sweeten said...

Michael, This post is intended as a satire when yiou view the video.

Michael W Cristiani said...

Oops! Sorry!