Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Asset Based Care and Counsel
Don't Take NO as the Answer
If we want to truly assist our family and friends we need to look carefully at their assets. This does not mean we ignore their needs, problems and concerns. As a therapist I can do a Differential Diagnosis and place a Client into a rigid category or two with little trouble. In fact, I can even give you a number and always refer to you as the Depressed Patient.
Take a quick look at that diagnosis. Is that all the person is? Have I successfully summarized that man by reducing him to a psychological category? If that Client were you would you be satisfied by that category or would you want me to know that you are much more than a Depressive?
You might say, "I am also a mother, an aunt, a Doctor and skilled bridge player and a talented golfer. Oh, by the way, I am also a devoted daughter of a wonderful mother."
If I were to ask you some simple questions I could discover that you have many skills and talents and gifts in addition to the NEEDS that brought you to my office. It is the problems that brought you to see my but it will take the strengths and abilities to get you healed. No one is healed by focusing on his/her weaknesses. In fact, that will very likely keep you depressed.
I immediately know some of your strengths and assets:
You have a very good ability to think. You are a Doctor and a bridge player, two things that demand an ability to reason well. Since Reasoned Christian Thinking is one of the best ways to rebound from depression there is a strong hope for a quick recovery.
Second, you have athletic abilities because you play golf. That tells me that since exercise is a great way to reduce depression you can take up walking or running.
Third, I can see that you have a warm, caring social and family support system, both of which are essential for recovery from depression.
Fourth, since I can quickly some of your assets it means that you are probably not using them to as well as you could so I can see ways to coach you that allows you to utilize those assets more effectively.
In depression, it is hard to see or affirm one's assets so a good coach, caring friend and counselor will work to encourage the client to more accurately assess them. This needs to be done with sensitivity but by listening carefully the client can begin to hope again and hope is essential to recovery.
As an exercise in regaining hope, write down some of your assets, strengths, gifts, talents and hobbies. Look them over daily and thank God for His wonderful blessings.
Count your blessings name them one by one
Count your blessings see what God has done