Death and Life are in the Tongue

My mentor in learning about the best ways to communicate God's love was Dr. Richard Walters who was then at the University of Georgia. Rich taught me about research that showed how our words and tone of voice could influence people for good or ill. Rich had done a doctoral dissertation at U of Georgia on that very topic. He wrote scenarios for actors that had some of them speaking harshly with criticism and contemptuous comments and others with caring tones and nurturing words.

The actors read those scripts into recorders and then asked volunteers to listen to them while having a pupilometer record the involuntary reaction of their eyes as they heard either death dealing or life giving parts being played. Can you guess what happened to the listeners' pupils?

When a volunteer heard scripts that were warm and caring their pupils relaxed and became smaller. However, when harsh and nasty scripts were heard the opposite occurred, indicating an automatic reaction of fear and a bodily response of fight or flight.

Remember, these were statements from anonymous actors not loved ones or people with power to harm the volunteer. Had such statements been made by a close friend or relative or a teacher, preacher or TV star the automatic response would likely be even more pronounced.

God knew this all along. That is why He had the Bible writers tell us to be careful how we speak to one another. On my doctoral dissertation I had the privilege of integrating the Bible and Psychological research and found that God's word accurately predicted that we can injure or bless others with our words. For example:

Death and life are in the power of the tongue,
and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it [for death or life] PR 18:21

As a result of my dissertation I have written several books on building positive Christian relationships. The last, Listening for Heaven's Sake, teaches believers how to develop health and life and peace in and with other people.

Don Imus has also discovered that the Bible is very true in this regard. He has insulted, delivered death and attacked the character of others for many years. Why would he do that? He made over 20 million dollars annually to deal in death. But, just as it says in Proverbs, those who love life will eat life but those who love death will reap and eat death.

Mr. Imus also learned that another Bible passage is true. For by your words you will be justified and acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned and sentenced. MT 12:37

Over the past week millions have heard the hateful, contemptuous words of the multi-millionaire Don Imus over, and over and over. Some used them to justify him and others used his words to condemn and carry out his sentence. In the end many of the companies like our own Procter and Gamble, who paid for him to spew forth garbage for many years withdrew their advertisements. That sank his boat.

The NBC and CBS Network officials said all the right and good things but it was a sham on their part. Until the ads were pulled the networks were supportive. They are rich hypocrites because they are still making millions by encouraging musician moguls to attack women with their vicious lyrics.

As an educator and Counselor I despise the words Imus used to describe the Rutgers' Basketball players. I am constantly helping men and women get over those kinds of terms that caused such deep wounds when they were young. However, Don Imus has much less ability to influence adults to mimic him that the rappers do with kids. If all of a sudden thousands of adult men started wearing cowboy hats, shooting up their homes and attacking minorities we could begin to worry.

Snoop Dog and 50 Cent on the other hand, have amazing influence on young people. Kids mimic the gangsta rappers in almost every way. In Cincinnati over 90% of all homicides are young Black men who are shot by other young Black men. About 75% of all Black babies are born outside of marriage, indicating that rappers ARE indeed having an effect on the youth of
America with their hostile, angry and sexually permissive words and lifestyles.

The least we Christians can do is remove all harsh, belittling and contemptuous language from our lives. Let us use Imus as a bad example and be sure not to emulate him.

Let there be no filthiness (obscenity, indecency) nor foolish and sinful (silly and corrupt) talk, nor coarse jesting, which are not fitting or becoming; but instead voice your thankfulness [to God]. EPH 5:4