Gotta Read This

The blog, Hope Abigail is a heart breaker and a place of faith, hope and love.

Growing Through Autism

The Bolduc Family

For the past two years I have been focusing a lot of time and energy on learning more about people who live with severe disabilities and how the family and friends who love and care for them get along in life. Some of the very special people I have met along the way are Kathy Bolduc and her husband Wally.


Kathy is better use her gifts of writing and praying to survive and thrive despite rearing a son born with rather severed Autism. Wally is a business man and a prayer warrior that takes teams of people around Cincinnati and the USA to support and love people in need with Gods truth and power.

Her web page is a wonderfully designed and written place to go for inspiration and understanding.

Kathy's recent interview on the Interfaith Magazine can be found here. It starts at minute 22 and 30 seconds. After reading her web I suggest that you listen to the interview and thank God for her talents and abilities as well as ask Him to pour out His grace and love on her, Wally and son Joel.

A Great Mystery

Do you like to see movies, TV shows and read books that keep you wondering what is going to happen next? I do. Some of the best are the old English murder mysteries. I recently saw "Dial M for Murder" again and I so enjoyed it even though I had seen it before. The cool, narcissistic demeanor of Ray Milland, the husband who wants to kill his beautiful wife Grace Kelly, kept me hoping he would get his comeuppance and, well you need to see it to find out what happened.

In my field, Christian Care and Counseling, there are some great mysteries. Perhaps not as scintillating as Grace Kelly but interesting to researchers and Counselors just the same. We know that some problems in society are growing dramatically but we don't know why but we need to find out the answer.

As I have recently posted, the number of persons suffering from depression, anxiety and other mental/emotional issues continues to increase in America and Western Europe. If you were born in the early part of the 20Th Century you would have seen far less of these issues than we do now. And that is a mystery.

Why are these diagnoses increasing? Why are depression and anxiety increasing so much? Poverty is often blamed for increasing crime rates and other social problems as if poor people are less moral than the wealthy. But poverty rates are decidedly better today than in 1918, 1928 or 1938. However, depression is worse today!

How about stress? That is often blamed for a multitude of problems. Are the stresses of life worse now than in 1918 when WWI was raging and the Spanish Flu was killing millions of young people? How about the stresses of The Great Depression and WWII? Were they less then than now?

I am curious what you think is the cause of so much increase. Write and let me know and I will respond to you.

Saying No!

I was meeting with some friends tonight and we catted about the importance of dealing with adversity in a healthy manner. This friend has faced more adversity in his young life than most people and usually has an up beat, positive manner.

I know from years of counseling depressed people and from reading the research on how to be depressed and anxious that optimism is key to a mentally healthy life.

I asked him how he managed to do it with so much physical and emotional stress on his plate. My friend is honest and said that he has not always bouncced back from the difficulties of life but I finally decided to stop taking my "Happy Pills" and overcome this depression and pessimism with my intellect.

I asked, "How did you manage to do that?"

"Well, I have to think positively and not let myself get down. When I do my wife bugs me and makes me cheer up. Now I have to sometimes challenge others to cheer up as well or they will bring me down."

"Explain that a bit more," I said.

"One of my relatives gets all worried and I have to say 'NO!' You can't do that and talk that way around here. I have learned how to say no to people."

He went on: "In fact, I have a saying that helps me. It goes like this: 'Learning to say no will bring your more satisfaction than learning Latin.'"

Isn't that terrific? I love it. We must learn to say no to ourselves and to others when things start to get pessimistic. If we don't, it will take us down into anxiety, worry and depression.

Thanks for that advice my friend. I will pass it on to others.

Empathy: What is it?

Mr. Obama says he wanted to pick a Supreme Court nominee with "empathy". He seems to think empathic judges will know the law better and make decisions that favor "the little guys not the big guys and gals".

What do you think about his philosophy of judging?

What do you think about his definition of empathy?

What do you think bout Judge Sotomayor?

Let me hear your comments.

Gary Sweeten

From Reality to Real Politics

It is easy to tell when a topic moves from being a focus on reality and becomes almost entirely political. For example, when I did my dissertation on integration of faith and soul care, the term "Evangelical" was clearly meant to describe a type of person who was deeply committed to Christ, the Bible and historic Christianity. Now it means a group of people who are trying to force their narrow views about life on the USA in defiance of the Constitution.

The same is true of "Pro Life". That term meant that a person believed that all human life was precious and created in God's image. Now it is used to mean that the person hates women and science.

Today I will focus on a view that has, until recently, dominated society, counseling and law. Everyone in authority agreed that homosexual behavior was abnormal and should not be encouraged. Additionally, the psychologists taught that it was an aberration that could through therapy, be healed and changed in many instances.

Today, any psychologist or counselor or lay person who says such things will be charged with "homophobia" and accosted as hating gay people. It is well known that a similar charge will not be made against a person who believes that depressives can be healed. I have counseled many depressed and anxious people as well as those who are fearful, angry or addicted but no one has accused me of hating the people I treat.

In those cases I am lauded as compassionate, empathic and concerned because I am responding helpfully to the requests of people who want out of painful situations.

I have also helped married couples stop fighting and adulterers trade adultery for better marital sex. I have shown parents how to stop yelling an start disciplining and they love it.

Because of my success I am asked to write, speak and consult. I am affirmed by many other counselors who want to learn from me. But when I mention that I have helped men and women stop their same sex attractions I am suddenly accosted as a mad man or evil charlatan.

What say you? Do you affirm counselors and peers who state that marriage was always intended for men and women? Can you support the Miss USA candidate who spoke up about her traditional views or do you think she is a homo-phobic that is spouting hate speech?

When A.A. leaders facilitate sobriety and community leaders put a stop to drugs do you see them as heroes or villains? If heroes then you will have to also applaud the courageous men and women at Exodus who have led thousands out of same sex temptations. Healing homosexuality is no more hateful or phobic than defeating depression or divrce.

Gary Sweeten

Russian Ministry

We are very excited to announce that The Lord has opened a way for us to publish Listening for Heaven's Sake in the Russian language. It helps us reach the goal of training Christians how to have a "Lifetime of great relationships". It is safe to say that relationships were severely damaged by the Seventy years of Socialist rule.

Socialists talk a lot about caring for ordinary people but the walk is far different. The USSR reminds me of the Madoff Investment Company that scammed ordinary people out of some 50 Billion Dollars. They even ripped off religious groups and other charities but always talked as though they loved the poor and would do anything for them.

Our books all focus on how ordinary people can live lives more abundant and free and how they can be a blessing to others. These ideas are rare in Post-Communist Russia and this little book can liberate thousands of people.

Take a look at Listening for Heavens Sake on the Russian site similar to www.amazon.com

Pray the the Holy Spirit will use it to be a doorway to healing and growth. Visit the web site of our ministry in Russia. Much of it is in English.

www.liferoute.ru

Gary Sweeten

www.sweetenlife.com

Rick Warren and Obama

Mr. Obama has asked Rick Warren to pray at his inauguration. Barney Franks and many others are mad. It is hard to love people with whom we disagree. It is even harder to disagree and still seem loving.

Way back in the Sixties and Seventies I saw a dramatic change occur among student protesters and the radical left. They began saying that anyone who disagreed with them did not "understand their point of view". We who interacted with them started saying, "I understand but I disagree." The students were undeterred.

Now those who grew up in that era and since have gone even farther. They say and think that disagreement is hatred. Some agencies have even come up with the term, "hate speech" to describe any argument that contradicts them.

Dr. Albert Mohler, President of the Southern Baptist Seminary has written a great article about the difficulty Evangelicals have on this score, especially when it comes to homosexual issues. Rick Warren openly disagrees with passing laws that allow homosexuals to marry. This is considered homophobic hate speech by the radicals.

Is there any way we can take a stand that disagrees with the popular culture and not be excoriated as haters? I doubt it. Taking unpopular stands used to be considered a mark of mature character development. In the popular media is is not a mark of hatred because it contradicts societal mores.

Maybe in a few years the USA and Western Europe will recognize Sharia Law. If so, it will require all laws to recognize and affirm polygamy. Can we Christians disagree with polygamy without being hate mongers? I doubt it.

Now is the time to decide how we can learn to "Agree to disagree agreeably" and teach it to everyone in the church. The pressures on such matters will increase not decrease. The test is coming in many areas and we need to prepare now for them.

What do you think?

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Video Link Restored

Last year when we kicked off the emphasis on Seasoned Believers Steve Helterbridle met with us to brainstorm how to make a short video that would help folks understand the issues we have found so important. He did and we called it, "What if?"

For some months the link was broken so Steve has put it up on GodTV and it is alive and working again. Take a look and let us know what you think.

Appreciation

One of the keys to good spiritual health is appreciation. My friends in Russia have a lot of that commodity. Despite having lived through a history of many bloody wars and revolutions as well as famine and persecution, many of my friends here appreciate God's love and mercy in a very deep way. Maybe that appreciation comes from having faced so many trials and tribulations.

I spoke yesterday with the woman who published our book, Listening for Heaven's Sake, in Russian. She mentioned that the number of Russian Protestant churches is shrinking from the high of the revivals in the Nineties. It is too hard to maintain a church here. Many of the new churches were started or funded by Western missionaries but could not sustain themselves after the missionaries left.

This is why it is so important to support local Russian leaders. Russian nationals must learn how to lead the churches here and overcome the many challenges they face. Space is very limited and money scarce. Getting from place to place to place long and streneous. Seventy years of Socialist oppression has left the people stunned and too often involved in addictive behaviors that chalenge the church in every way.

I am convinced that the work of equipping and encouragement is the most important thing we can do. Healthy leaders are necessary to have a chelthy church. None of us can lead others farther than we have gone ourselves. Leadership!

Thanks for your prayers. Our local friends do appreciate them very much.

Gary Sweeten
Moscow
http://www.sweetenlife.com/