Opening a Can of Worms!
My international readers may not know it but millions of Americans live far, far away from the town where they grew up. Many of them "go back home" to see relatives and friends during Thanksgiving, the third weekend in November, and Christmas, the last week of December.
The return home can provoke a lot of anxiety because we have moved away from the customs and values of our family of origin and find it difficult to remember how to act properly in that old environment. It is also hard on the "old folks back home" because they tend to think of us as we were as kids and that was a long time and many changes ago.
I was a rebel as a kid and my family tended to see me through that prism even though I left most of my rebellion behind a long time ago. I can remember how hard it was when Karen and I first began to return home from Cincinnati. I had gotten a couple of college degrees, fathered a child and became Associate Dean at U.C. Yet, I was tempted to regress in my behavior away from a mature adult to the teenage rebel of so many years ago.
I found myself being irritated by the same things that had bugged me as a teen and Mother was so unreasonable and parental. It seemed to me that I was all grown up but Mother treated me like a child. It was all her fault! (Thankfully, Karen was able to point out that I was acting like a teenager not like an adult. Boy, did that sting!)
As you prepare to go back home or to see your family that is returning to the homestead, ask yourself some questions:
1. Do I treat my family members as well as I want to be treated?
2. Do I treat my family like I treat other adults?
3. Do I have some of the same feelings I had as a kid when I interact with my parents and siblings?
4. Do I judge my family more harshly than I judge others?
5. Do I have peace when I think about my family?
6. Are there things I would like to straighten out in them?
7. Is God happy with the way I honor my family?
How are you preparing to go home again? Prayer might help.
Gary Sweeten
http://www.sweetenlife.com/
My international readers may not know it but millions of Americans live far, far away from the town where they grew up. Many of them "go back home" to see relatives and friends during Thanksgiving, the third weekend in November, and Christmas, the last week of December.
The return home can provoke a lot of anxiety because we have moved away from the customs and values of our family of origin and find it difficult to remember how to act properly in that old environment. It is also hard on the "old folks back home" because they tend to think of us as we were as kids and that was a long time and many changes ago.
I was a rebel as a kid and my family tended to see me through that prism even though I left most of my rebellion behind a long time ago. I can remember how hard it was when Karen and I first began to return home from Cincinnati. I had gotten a couple of college degrees, fathered a child and became Associate Dean at U.C. Yet, I was tempted to regress in my behavior away from a mature adult to the teenage rebel of so many years ago.
I found myself being irritated by the same things that had bugged me as a teen and Mother was so unreasonable and parental. It seemed to me that I was all grown up but Mother treated me like a child. It was all her fault! (Thankfully, Karen was able to point out that I was acting like a teenager not like an adult. Boy, did that sting!)
As you prepare to go back home or to see your family that is returning to the homestead, ask yourself some questions:
1. Do I treat my family members as well as I want to be treated?
2. Do I treat my family like I treat other adults?
3. Do I have some of the same feelings I had as a kid when I interact with my parents and siblings?
4. Do I judge my family more harshly than I judge others?
5. Do I have peace when I think about my family?
6. Are there things I would like to straighten out in them?
7. Is God happy with the way I honor my family?
How are you preparing to go home again? Prayer might help.
Gary Sweeten
http://www.sweetenlife.com/
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