Statistics the Speak Loudly

5% Increase in the U.S. suicide rate since 1999.
16% Increase in the U.S. suicide rate among those ages 40-64

The most distressed and hopeless among us are single, white mothers who do
not attend church. Would church attendance reduce suicide?

Do you know what to do to help a suicidal friend or family member?

Would you like to help?
Gary Sweeten
www.sweetenlife.com

Why Do I Have Hope?

If I did not have hope and faith that substantial change and improvement was possible I would retire immediately. Being a Minister or a Counselor is challenging and difficult in any event. However, to be a Helper when you do not believe that God can bring SUBSTANTIAL HEALING is almost impossible to contemplate.

I have ministered personally to thousands of hurting people and trained numerous Helpers to minister to multiplied thousands. Their problems varied from depression, anxiety, adultery, fear and sexual addiction to anger, bitterness and aggression. I have seen far more people receive substantial healing than those who dropped out. In fact, those people who are motivated to change and will do the hard work it requires always experience healing and relief.

No one experiences Perfection.

Everyone can experience PROGRESS.

Steve Griebling and I wrote a book several years ago that lays out the basic principles of facilitating change. Hope and Change for Humpty Dumpty is featured on the side of this blog and it can be ordered at Author House.

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Sweeten Life Systems Update

Our board met yesterday and it was quite an experience. One member was in Norway one in Florida, one in Wisconsin and another is in Moscow, Russia. We were able to connect most of our members one way or another.

Rick Brown CPA is our treasurer and he was in Florida on business but called in to give his report. It is terrific to such talented and gifted board members.

Galina Chentsova attended for two hours via video phone from Moscow. She joined Jens-Petter Jorgensen as an International Representative. It was amazing to see and hear Galina so clearly from several thousand miles away. And, it is free. Before long we will add video conferencing to our schedule of training in Russia. (The photo is of our book, Listening for Heaven's Sake in Russian. It was originally called Apples of Gold)

My Skype name is gary.r.sweeten

What is your Skype name?

Great Things in 2009




The health of Sweeten Life Systems is good. God is blessing us and expanding our influence both in the open and behind the scenes. We received a grant to develop systems to support for families with special needs children.


In 2009 we will emphasize the Families of God.
1. The historic Family of Grand Parents and past
2. The Family of Origin of Parents and Siblings
3. The Nuclear Family of Parents and Children
4. The Extended Family of Relatives
5. The Church Family of Families
6. The Work Family
7. The Neighborhood Family of Friends


You will note the word "SYSTEMS" in our name. That is . We know that any event traumatic or great, that impacts one member of a family impacts every member. We are unique in intervening in families to upbuild the entire system. Thus, we have a biblical approach.


Important Family Event

Come to The Healing Center on Century Circle, near The Vineyard Community Church, on Saturday afternoon, January 24 at 1:00 to 4:00 PM to get an introduction to Family Systems thinking and how to support families in need. "It Takes Village".

More information later.

Gary Sweeten
http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Joy at Christmas

Take a look at the way this four month baby is laughing. I am amazed at the way she watched her big brother Jack Sweeten and laughed at his shenanigans. The parents and extended family are watching.

Facebook and Other Ways to Communicate

In addition to blogging, I have been on Facebook for some time and it is growing on me. I can post photos and send messages as well as keep up with friends. Look me up and say something nice about my Christmas photos.

I am also on Linkedin and Plaxo. Linkedin is a network of professional consultants and Plaxo is sort of like Facebook but it actually keeps everyone up to date on addresses, mail, emails, etc. So, if anything changes your Outlook is instantly updated.

It takes time to write on every body's wall.

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Good Craftmanship

I graduated from high school in 1956. I immediately took a job with The Dowzer Electric Company in Mt. Vernon, Illinois. I made about $1.00 an hour. My Uncle John A. Kirk was the company attorney and he put in a good word for me.

One of my first acts shortly after taking that job was to buy some tools. My boss and all the fellow workers told me to go to Sears Roebuck, now it is just Sears, and buy Craftsman Tools because they were the best tools available.

I protested because they were also pretty expensive and I had not begun to get paid yet so I was looking for a deal. But, my fellow workers prevailed when they said, "You will get a lifetime guarantee from Sears. If any of your tools ever break or stop working just take them back and get a new tool in return.

Last week I took two of my socket wrenches back to Sears because they were no longer in working condition. I walked in and said, "In 1956 I bought a set of Craftsman Tools and two of them are frozen up so badly they will not work."

The man said, "Sure, no problem. Let me see them."

I attempted to show him the problem but he just wanted to know what size they were so he could get the correct replacement. He quickly found two replacements and took my 56 models away with a wave and a brief "Thanks for stopping in".

Now that is service with a smile.

Would your local church offer that kind of service? Does God?

What think ye?

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Who Contributes More, Left or Right

Nicholas Kristof, a writer for the New York Times has a very controversial column on giving and generosity. He is looking at the data on politics, religion and generosity and comes to some painful conclusions.

Look at his blog and tell me what you think.

Charities Threatened by the New Administration

The corps of Mr. Obama's administrative group is busily looking for new sources of revenue. Since foundations give out over 43 Billion Dollars each year in grants to non-profit groups, the new guys in town are thinking about getting their hands on some of it.

The Wall Street Journal has a good article about the many positive things that are accomplished by foundations and the non profits that are funded by them. Since I head a non profit I am biased about how much good we can accomplish for less money. I know that a lot of stuff we do, if not most of it, is done by volunteers and lowly paid workers.

We are motivated by a passion for helping people not money so we tend not to be as interested in remuneration. Despite that, non profits produce amazing benefits to the local and national society. In fact, research indicates that faith based groups are the glue which holds our society together. But we need to watch out lest the radicals on the Left Wing squash us like bugs because we are not always "Politically Correct".

Rick Warren and Obama

Mr. Obama has asked Rick Warren to pray at his inauguration. Barney Franks and many others are mad. It is hard to love people with whom we disagree. It is even harder to disagree and still seem loving.

Way back in the Sixties and Seventies I saw a dramatic change occur among student protesters and the radical left. They began saying that anyone who disagreed with them did not "understand their point of view". We who interacted with them started saying, "I understand but I disagree." The students were undeterred.

Now those who grew up in that era and since have gone even farther. They say and think that disagreement is hatred. Some agencies have even come up with the term, "hate speech" to describe any argument that contradicts them.

Dr. Albert Mohler, President of the Southern Baptist Seminary has written a great article about the difficulty Evangelicals have on this score, especially when it comes to homosexual issues. Rick Warren openly disagrees with passing laws that allow homosexuals to marry. This is considered homophobic hate speech by the radicals.

Is there any way we can take a stand that disagrees with the popular culture and not be excoriated as haters? I doubt it. Taking unpopular stands used to be considered a mark of mature character development. In the popular media is is not a mark of hatred because it contradicts societal mores.

Maybe in a few years the USA and Western Europe will recognize Sharia Law. If so, it will require all laws to recognize and affirm polygamy. Can we Christians disagree with polygamy without being hate mongers? I doubt it.

Now is the time to decide how we can learn to "Agree to disagree agreeably" and teach it to everyone in the church. The pressures on such matters will increase not decrease. The test is coming in many areas and we need to prepare now for them.

What do you think?

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Law versus Grace

"While I regarded God as a tyrant I thought my sin a trifle; But when I knew Him to be my Father, then I mourned that I could ever have kicked against Him. When I thought God was hard, I found it easy to sin; but when I found God so kind, so good, so overflowing with compassion, I smote upon my breast to think that I could ever have rebelled against One who loved me so, and sought my good."

C.H. Spurgeon

Getting the Horse to Drink the Water

You can lead the horse to water but you cannot make him drink

You can teach the people lots of things but you cannot make them think

Steps to facilitate drinking and thinking:

1. Build a long term relationship. People don't change immediately. We all go through several stages even when we do change. As the Bible says: "Do not grow weary in doing good."

2. Listen more than you talk. If you were to hear an audio tape of your conversations, would it show you talking or listening more?

3. Be interested in what the other people are talking about. Allow them to tell their story. They are much more interested in their story than your stories.

4. Remove all B.S. from your conversation. B.S. stands for Blame and Shame. Do you like to talk with people who Blame you and Shame you? Neither do I.

5. Pray silently for them. God hears you but they don't need to.

6. Tune in to their mood.

Are they somber? Be low key.

Are the happy. Laugh with them.

7. Take your time. God is in no hurry.

8. Relax. Peacefulness begets trust. Give it to God. We are not in control.

9. Buy the coffee or the meal. Give and it shall be given unto you.

10. Remember, there are two things that rarely ever happen. They are: Everything and nothing. What usually happens is something. One small step is more than enough for things to change.

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Memories

Many years ago the Lord showed me that Jesus approach was unique. Instead of using only His gifts knowledge and talents to change the world. He actually said,"it is better that I go away."

To our ears, that just doesn't make much sense. We love powerful people. We love to place humans on pedestals. Even though Jesus was and is the Son of God He said, "You will do greater things than I."

How is it better that Jesus went away? He was the greatest. He was Messiah. He healed, He delivered, he turned water into wine.

He established a system to multiply Himself over and over again so the entire world could hear the good news, be healed, receive deliverance and have eternal life. How? By sending us into the world to teach and do everything that He did.

At Christmas I receive many cards, emails and letter from friends living next door as well as ten thousand miles away. It is great to see how many of them are still using what they learned from our equipping travels. We took the words of Jesus to heart and decided not to try to heal and minister to everyone individually but to multiply ourselves over and over again.

It is tempting to try to be the Savior/healer/rescuer to all people in need. I am very co-dependent. I need to be needed. But God has challenged me to stop riding my white horse and allow others to serve, teach and heal.

Every Christmas I get letters telling how folks from my past are still using what they learned from Teleios, EMI, Life Way Ministries and Sweeten Life Systems. It is another proof that Jesus was right. The call of is to "Go into all the world and make disciples" not "Go make sermons."

My Christmas email from Kjell Aanenson of Norway sparked this post when he wrote: 2008 has been a year of change and celebration for us. I, Kjell, is not anymore employed by Teleios Norway. But I still have a partnership with TN. I now have two jobs. (With) a Christian health organisation to develop and lead courses for Pastors and Christian leaders, to help them prevent burnout and to teach and counsel them for a healthier life, marriage and ministry. It is a 6 days course at our new Center. We also will develop this course for teachers, nurses, doctors and police.

I... continue to teach in Churches, and to counsel Christian leaders, people in general and couples. Both jobs is a blessing to fulfil what the Lord has called me to do!

Kjell was in a group led by Larry Chrouch in Norway in 1978. His life was changed and he has ministered to thousands since. Thank God for Larry and Ellen Chrouch and Kjell and Magnhild Aanenson

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

How to Win and Influence People

In June of 1958 I had a fearful and wonderful encounter with God's Spirit. It changed my life and I Ford I heard the still small voice of the Spirit say, "Go to college." That was amazing because I was not really "college material" nor did my family and friends encourage such flights of irresponsible fancy. (Working in a factory was responsible and practical.)

So, I quit my factory job and applied to Mt. Vernon Community College. I had to learn to study and learn how to interact with educated students and teachers. I loved it and discovered that I was not as dumb as I seemed. I was newly motivated and newly interested in studying.

I studied to be a teacher and that led me to what were back then called, "Teachers' Education Classes" at Southern Illinois University. Those classes helped me a lot because they focused on how to not only understand math and reading but also how to transmit it to the kids. In other words, how to see to it that the kids learned from me.

I was a pretty good student in Elementary School. I read well and remembered a lot of it. So, I thought it was all about remembering the data that was put in front of me. I was wrong. I found that it was important to get the pupils engaged in the materials in such a way that they WANTED to remember it. How could I motivate the pupils to be learners.

You can lead the horse to water but you cannot make him drink.

This old saw was right. I knew it but I had never studied how to make the horse thirsty before I took those classes in Educational Psychology. Now here is my point. How do we help people outside the church desire the living water?

This is an issue of great importance to us. People will not come to faith in Christ or attend worship, read the Bible or practice the charitable activities of the Christian life unless they are attracted to those things. So, how do we become more attractive while holding to the foundations of our faith?

What do you think? What has helped you draw others to Christ and His life?

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Fund Raising

Thanks for your support.

The fact that Americans give so much to charity is a wonderful testimony to America's Judeo-Christian ideals. Giving is part of the warp and woof of the Bible's teachings. In fact, the term, "Tithe" is widely used in our culture even by unbelievers. American individuals give billions of dollars each year to support churches and other non profit groups.

Europeans are often mystified about why we Yanks are so fervent about volunteering, religion and giving. The core reason is our commitment to the separation of church and state. The focus on every church member and every citizen's duty to care for others. The history of state churches in Europe made the governments responsible for charitable acts and the operating environments in the two regions are radically different as a result.

Sweeten Life Systems is dependent upon the voluntary gifts and offerings of individuals, churches and companies. We also receive some government and private foundation grants to carry out our charitable works. America shines because grants keep many charities going. Foundations are kept strong by the tax laws and heart felt desires of well off persons to serve the needs of others.

We are in the midst of a huge financial downturn. Still, we need your support. Sweeten Life is focused on working to strengthen the lives of individuals and families to prevent emotional, spiritual and family crises. We help people in their ability to assist others.

I am a retired Family Therapist who has served many people in crises. I now serve hundreds of families when we prevent a crisis from occurring. "A stitch in time really does save nine..."

May God empower you to be a blessing to others in faith, hope and charity. You have been a blessing to us.

Gary Sweeten
www.sweetenlife.com

Starbucks Marketing

Want to see a fun video about marketing in the church?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7_dZTrjw9I

What I Learned In Sunday School

A WATCH Prayer GatheringGary SweetenGuard your steps when you go to the house of God. Go near to listen rather than to offer the sacrifice of fools, who do not know that they do wrong. Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God.

God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few. As a dream comes when there are many cares, so the speech of a fool when there are many words. Much dreaming and many words are meaningless. Therefore stand in awe of God. Ecc 5: 1-5All around the world you can see them. Even more, you can hear them. Kneeling, sitting or standing it is a movement. Many of them dance, some march in military order while others are less orderly and more ardor-ly. The noise can be awesome and when meeting with upraised hands and outstretched voices, the buildings shake with joy.

Martian visitors would react with puzzlement to the strange behavior. They might even "beam a bunch up" for intense investigation by their Martian scientists. The "little green men" would want to know what the strange rituals were all about.Prayer! It is all about prayer. Last week a friend mentioned that she had spent four days with a thousand like-minded men and women. They gathered to practice prayers of "spiritual warfare". Another group is heading out to Colorado for a week to of fasting and prayer to light the sparks for a national revival.

Prayer. It is everywhere. It is taught, preached, urged and even practiced around the earth with increasing regularity. There is a growing desire of the people of God to pray. This is especially evident when we consider the enormous number of "Prayer Movements" that have arisen over the past few years.

Many groups sponsor prayer events. Concerts of Prayer, Taking Our Cities for Christ, National Day of Prayer, The March for Jesus, Bill Bright's Prayer and Fasting, Renewal Ministries-Terry Teykl, Lausanne Movement, AD2000 & Beyond, etc. These initiatives are all based on the assumption that God desires His people to pray and that prayer "changes things." In conversations, teachings, seminars and conferences we are reminded that revival, renewal and reformations will. Unfortunately, it seems that we sometimes sacrifice the quality of prayer gatherings while emphasizing quantity. I am not convinced that "more is better". When it comes to prayer for evangelism, revival, social action and awakenings it seems that quality is critical while keeping the quantity of prayer and the number of pray-errs high. I was reared in a family that had a long tradition of prayer. Unfortunately, some of the things I saw and mimicked were not very qualitative. For example, I pray like this.

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.If I should die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.

Despite the earnest and heartfelt desire of my parents and grandparents to teach my brothers and me good prayer habits, this childhood prayer failed. It brought me fear and anxiety rather than peace and faith. Each night I went to bed thinking that I might not wake up. My primary focus was eternal safety in an uncertain and dangerous world.

My earliest prayer habits were formed in fear not faith and reinforced as being desperate calls to a distant God. I begged Him to receive my unworthy soul in the event that I failed to survive the rigors of sleep. No wonder so many children have nightmares! But I have a partial solution. Here is a prayer we can trust.

A New Prayer for Sleeping

Now I lay me down to sleep
I thank the Lord my soul will keep.

No fear of night,
He will provide
His angels near,
My sleeping side

At morning's dawn,
I will awake,
To live again
For Jesus' sake

He gives me strength,The whole night rest,
Enough each day
To give my best
© Gary Sweeten
Early childhood experiences do not predetermine our life's course. I have been able to go beyond my youth and develop a healthy approach to God. I reframed the fearful prayer written during the Black Plague and wrote one filled with faith, hope and love. But early experiences do influence us and our children. It is a good idea to examine how we pray as adults so we can evaluate our approach to check its biblical basis.

Comments? How did you learn to pray?

How to Abide in Christ

TO: All Who Wish to Abide in the Vine
From: Gary and His Grapes

Have you ever tried to make yourself go to sleep? Say it over and over: “I am sleepy; I am sleepy: I need to sleep!” Will that “work”? Will my prayers be answered if I try to make myself sleepy? The act of trying to sleep can interrupt the normal processes of sleepiness. In other words, trying to force myself to sleep keeps me awake. Trying to have faith and rest in Christ is similar.

I have been trying to bear more fruit for Jesus and I know that it requires additional faith to do so. As a result of my study in John 15 and other passages plus books like “In His Steps” I decided to try hard to be Jesus. It wore me out. I felt like such a failure and so condemned all the time that it actually led me into deep depression. I figured that it proved that I had no faith.

In desperation I reread John 15 about bearing fruit. This led me to a great insight. If I wanted to grow more fruit I needed to see how fruit grew best. As a result I spent an entire year researching grapes and how they managed to abide in the vine. I interviewed the big, juicy, fat grapes, since they had mastered the abiding techniques well. It was an intense process.

Below is a sample of some of my interviews. I had 58,966 interviews but most of then ended up sounding just like this one.

Gary: Hello, Mr. Grape. You are so big, juicy and well developed that I want to find out the secret of your success.

Grape: Sure. Thanks for the compliment. I am pretty big and strong.

Gary: You must have worked very hard to get so big and healthy.

Grape: What!! I don’t understand your question. Did you say that I must have worked hard to grow?

Gary: Well, yes. Almost all the preachers, theologians and Sunday school teachers have taught that we are supposed to abide in Jesus the Vine by working hard to please Him.

Grape: Are you nuts? I did nothing. I simply hung on to the vine.

Gary: But, Mr. Grape, how were you able to abide so well? It must be very hard work.

Grape: Where did you study agriculture, the USSR? I am telling you that abiding is resting and I can do nothing on my own. In fact, I have no ability to do anything in the realm of sticking or working to abide more. The vine holds on to me not the other way around.

Gary: That makes no sense to me. It contradicts everything I have ever heard in church and on Christian TV.

Grape: Well, those people don’t seem to know much about fruit, growth and vines. I don’t know where they got that nonsense.

Gary: So, what was it that kept you living in the vine? Was it was your faith in abiding that allowed you to develop so much juice and produce so much? How did you develop into such a giant of faith? Was it hard to do? What about all your failures?

Grape: What do you mean, develop stronger faith so I could be a “Grape of Great Faith”? I have no idea why you are trying to make this so hard? The vine did it all. Every day I just live in the sun, drink what the vine gives me and enjoy the whole thing.

Gary: How do you convince the vine to give you all of that good juice? How do you make sure it is willing to keep you attached?

Grape: This is crazy. I do not even know how to ask the vine for more let alone make it give me anything. It is the very nature of vines to hold on to the grapes. My parents and grandparents all grew up this same way. They just rested in the vine and told me to enjoy the ride.

Gary: I’m not so sure that will work. It makes me nervous to just rest. I always feel better when I try real hard to please the vine and groan to produce more juice.

Grape: By the way, you are making me so nervous it may interfere with my juice production. Anxiety makes me have acid and that eats away at my juice production. Why don’t you go interview some apples or figs? Go see how hard they work to grow so large and juicy.

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Pass it on

Small Groups that are Missional

Although many people are using the term missional almost as often as they say, "LIKE" or "You Know" I don't find many who understand the term at all. It has become a buzz word and used to replace Post Modern.

Here is what a church can do to become missional. Remember the basics of the good news and preach Christ resurrected from the grave. Also remember that almost everyone who comes to Christ does so through a family member of friend. Few come in big meetings or evangelistic events.

Campus groups have been remarkably successful in sharing the gospel among high school and college students. I cannot count the number of adults who Committed their lives to Christ through a fellow student from IV, Campus Crusade, Navigators, Young Life, etc.

One reason is that the groups are focused on reaching out to friends. That is a very successful strategy. Intentional outreach is much more successful than accidental outreach.

Every group needs to have an outreach. Later I will lay out the ways to design groups for maximum impact.

Gary Sweeten

www.sweetenlife.com

Winning the TV News Ratings

CABLE NEWS RACE FOR MON, DEC. 15, 2008

FOXNEWS O'REILLY 3,855,000
FOXNEWS HANNITY/COLMES 2,619,000
FOXNEWS SHEP SMITH 2,087,000
FOXNEWS GRETA 2,020,000
CNNHN NANCY GRACE 2,007,000
FOXNEWS HUME 1,917,000
MSNBC OLBERMANN 1,454,000
MSNBC MADDOW 1,321,000
CNN COOPER 1,207,000
CNN KING 1,102,000
MSNBC HARDBALL 1,009,000

Who do you watch?

Gary Sweeten
www.sweetenlife.com

Do We Have A Testimony?

John the Revelator wrote that we can overcome the evil one by the word of their testimony. It occurred to me again that our testimony of faith is important to ourselves, our family and our friends as well as those who do not know Christ. I went in with a diagnosis of 70% to 90% clogging and came out with a clean bill of health. It is a wonderful affirmation of the power of prayer and certainly encourages me to keep pouring on the intercession for Daniela as well as other hard cases.

I preached at Tri County Assembly the last two weeks. The first week was just one day before my surgery the second week was after the physicians found no blockage in my arteries. Founding Pastor and long time friend Hugh Rosenberg anointed me with oil and he prayed with son Brad as the entire congregation reached out to me with intercession.

I am feeling good. I will be speaking at Dwelling Place the next two Sundays on The Holy Spirit so I am excited to continue to share the good news of Christ as Savior and Healer. This is how a healing community operates. It is love, prayer and encouragement that brings wholeness.

Keep telling the great news!

Gary Sweeten
www.sweetenlife.com

Skype is Wonderful

I have been discovering the wonders of Skype, a free system of audio/video calling, for the last few weeks. Jim Donovan and I have talked twice and I finally got hooked up with Galina in Moscow, Russia today.

I had a few problems with my camera because I opened it up on the desk top and that interferes with the Skype hook up. I finally got my camera to operate two ways today so I could see both Galina and her daughter Anya as clear as bells. Now get this: It is free for both audio and video calls.

Go to http://www.skype.com/ and read all about it.

Gary Sweeten

www.sweetenlife.com

President Bush Honored for Charity

WASHINGTON, Dec. 1, 2008 – President George W. Bush was honored on the 20th anniversary of World AIDS Day with the "International Medal of PEACE" given by Pastor Rick Warren on behalf of the Global PEACE Coalition during the Saddleback Civil Forum on Global Health.

The award, given in recognition of the President's tireless efforts and unprecedented contribution to the fight against HIV/AIDS and other diseases, came on the heels of the President's announcement that his Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR) had fulfilled its commitment to support treatment for two million people ahead of schedule.

Growth and Healing

Valerie Chan and son in Singapore. Our approach works all over the world.

For some time I have been attracted to helping people grow into mature, caring and loving adults. I don't know why, but there it is. I suppose God placed it in my heart as a fetus or young child. My wife has always said that I have job security because the world, the flesh and the devil are arrayed against us so fiercely that people are being wounded at a faster rate than we can put them together again.

Just think how long it takes us to glue a vase together after we drop it and break it into a million pieces. The pieces must be carefully and gently put together with some Gorilla Glue and let it dry over a period of time. Even then, there are rough places and jagged pieces on the vase that just do not seem to fit exactly.

A human being is more complex and difficult to mend than any vase so it does not shock us if putting people back together takes a long time. The Lord God will give us the peace and patience necessary to hang out with a person that is recovering from childhood trauma or a misspent life of bad habits.

But, make no mistake, there is hope for change and for significant healing. No one will ever be 100% perfect and live above sin but God's word promises and our experiences confirms that the power of prayer, truth and love are daily overcoming the ravages of sin, sickness and Satan.

My recent diagnosis by leading Doctors that an artery was severely clogged shows that God often allows us to receive His healing love. That was evidence of His substantial healing in the physical realm but we have had hundreds of similar experiences with emotional, relational and family dysfunctions.

Some members of the Christian Church have given up on God's ability to heal and forgive. They are, in my view, often so emotionally compassionate that they cannot stand seeing people in pain. As a result they offer non biblical but emotionally satisfying reasons why God does not mind if we violate traditional standards of sexual and ethical behavior. In their haste to lighten the load of people's inner pain they refuse to admit that Guilt is real.

This is like a Doctor acting as though diseases are not real. In my profession we call that approach "DENIAL". Denial of the reality of guilt leaves people in their pain, conviction and trauma. As a Counselor I am so thankful that I know guilt is real because that allows me to also apply the remedy: Confession and Repentance.

If a Doctor denies the reality of a communicable disease he has no remedy for the sickness. But, once he faces reality and understand its cause he can apply the remedy. Before we understood the reality of micro organisms Doctors were helpless to deal with the root of many illnesses. Dr. Ignatz Simmelweiss of AUSTRIA was attacked when he began to sterilize his surgical instruments between surgeries. It was so bad that he had a mental breakdown. However, he and others finally proved the existence of those tiny, invisible organisms and now everybody sterilizes their instruments and gives patients medicines to kill them at the root.

The root of many mental, emotional, relational and family illnesses are invisible to the human eye and to the best microscopes. However, God has revealed those things to us in the Bible and we know how to use His truth, Love and Power to bring relief and healing. Sin, guilt, shame and rebellious spirits are overwhelming if left without a remedy.

As a Christian Counselor and Minister I know and help people face these root problems and remove them forever. Out of the root grows the fruit so when the root is changed the fruit will change. However, trying to change the fruit without healing the root is fruitless.

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

God Answers Prayers

Thanks for all the prayers that were lifted to The Great Physician about my clogged arteries. Last week when I had a nuclear stress test the picture came back loud and clear. One of my arteries was clogged up pretty badly. That is not something you want to hear from your Cardiologist.

My Cardiologist, Dr. Dean Kereiakes, is a great person and a terrific Doctor. He saved my life in 1999 after I flew back from Singapore with a severely clogged artery and chest pains on a plane. He keeps a close watch on my condition and, thankfully he is a perfectionist when it comes to keeping me healthy.

When he called and told me I needed another stint I agreed to get in to the Cath Lab as soon as possible so I was there at The Christ Hospital at 6:00 AM last Monday. The entire staff of nurses, technicians and Doctors were warm caring and very professional. They did the angiogram and Dr. K came around to tell me in a stunned tone that the clogged artery was unclogged. He said, "But we got a very clear picture of it on the nuclear exam. I cannot understand it."

Dr. K and the team at Christ is the best there is. I trust them with my life and I trust them with the pictures but that which they saw was now gone. I told Dr. K and the staff that I really appreciated their skill and care. I also said, "I have asked hundreds of friends to pray that the Holy Spirit would clean that artery out so a stint would not be necessary. I think the prayers were answered."

Praise God from who all blessings flow and from whom all good gifts come down from above. Thank you for praying. I rarely ever hear of something as dramatic and complete as this answer to prayer. I know I do not deserve it nor did I earn it. It is all grace and I can not explain why God answered the prayers for me and not for others. God alone understands His plan and His ways.

Never underestimate the power of prayer, even when you do not get the answer we want. There is too much work and too little prayer. too much worry and too little prayer. Too much talk and too little prayer.

Prayer is the work of the church.

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Thanks Be to God

So, you get the picture. I was having some extremely painful and scary angina pains while flying to Singapore via Tokyo. I was pretty scared, anxious and my blood pressure went up placing me in an even more dangerous situation.

I am very thankful that God orchestrated things for a heart transplant surgeon got on the plane in Minneapolis and flew on to Tokyo with me. This man and his assistant had enough equipment on the airplane to open up my chest and save my life. That kind of drastic action was not necessary but he gave the airline personnel and me the wisest and best advice possible.

He strongly advised me to continue on to Singapore to get the necessary cardiac treatment. I did and when I arrived in Singapore my friends got me to a well known cardiologist who had me tested for heart damage. He suggested that I immediately enter the hospital for an angiogram test and possibly a stint through angioplasty. But, the best doctor in Singapore was not there and the physician would not recommend anyone else.

The result was I called North West Airline and told them I had to get back home immediately for a medical procedure. In the meantime, Karen called Christ Hospital and tried to schedule an appointment with Doctor Kereiakes, who was not taking any new patients. So, she called Diane Francis, a Chaplain who told Head Chaplain Doug Mitchell, who walked over to The Ohio Heart Center and asked Dr. K to see me.

It takes about 25 hours to fly back from Singapore but when I returned Dr. K got me in immediately and the next day I was in the Cath Lab getting a stint. I am extremely thankful for the skilled, caring and quick acting friends and professionals who saved my life and got me the help I needed.

Tomorrow morning I return to The Christ Hospital to Dr. K's Cath Lab for another procedure. I am trusting God and the skilled people at The Ohio Heart Center to get me through the ordeal.

Thanks for all your prayers and love.

Anxiety on a Plane

Resting in Jesus

The Doctor who attended me on that rugged North West flight to Tokyo and Singapore was very helpful. He immediately had the attendant give me an aspirin and a nitro pill. Then he took my blood pressure and said, "It is pretty high. Give him another nitro."

Of course my BP was high. I was high! 50,000 feet above Alaska with chest pains, of course I was stressed. My mind was going crazy with thoughts bot rational and irrational. First, I knew that during a heart attack stress and anxiety increase the chances of damage. So, I was saying to myself things like, "Calm down! You are going to kill yourself by irrational al thinking!" followed by "It is not irrational to think I am dying because I may be dying." Then I would say, "Be calm Gary. Be calm."

The Doctor said something like, "You need to get your BP down, sir. It is dangerous to have such a high level of blood pressure." I wanted to protest and tell this guy I already knew all that but thought better of it. So, I said, "Go away for ten minutes and come back and my blood pressure will be lower."

His eyes opened wide and he asked sceptically, "What are you going to do?" (I think he assumed I was going to do some dope or drink some of the free alcohol.)

"Well, Doctor, I am going to pray."

"Oh" he said, "that can't hurt."

He left and I closed my eyes and began to pray in the Spirit. I still had to practice all the disciplines I had learned and taught in Renewed Thinking and I started to thank God for His mercy and grace. First, I thanked God for teaching me the principles of RCT. Second, I thanked Him for having a cardiologist on the plane with me. (The Doctor was a heart transplant specialist.) Third, I began to thank God for everything I could think about and I used RCT to stop the ANTS (Automatic Negative Thoughts) that kept insisting that I pay attention to them instead of God.)

I also prayed and sang in English and the Spirit and I began to feel myself relax and release the tension in my chest. It wasn't perfect but it was better than average so I was able to reduce my BP and my anxiety. When the Doctor returned with the BP cuff he said, "It is better but still too high." I laughed and said, "You came back too soon. Let me pray some more and it will come down more." He left and I prayed until I went to sleep. (Which was a blessing and evidence of God's favor.)

What do you do when the ANTS (Automatic Negative Thoughts) of life crawl out of their ANT Hills and attack your mind and body? Do you know how to pray and focus on God or do you find yourself defenseless to the ravages of stressful thinking?

I am very thankful I learned the processes of Renewing My Mind as the Bible says. When a crisis occurs, and it will always be just around the corner, God has given us the ability to stop the Stinking Thinking and develop a Sober Mind and Peaceful body. Write me if you would like to learn how.

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

gary@sweetenlife.com

When the Skies are Unfriendly

Last night at about 12:30 I wrote the previous post. Now I am following up on it with a few comments.

The flight attendant on my plane from Minneapolis to Tokyo was nice as could be before I asked for help with my chest pains. After that, she tried her best to care for me but I was reminded of the nurses' prayer, "Just don't die on my shift." This gal put on all kinds of protective gear and carried an oxygen tank and a first aid kit with her mask tightly tugging her face, better to cover the panic theron.

The captain was calling for a Doctor to come to the Business Class I was riding with my hard earned frequent flier points. Before long a man showed up and introduced himself as Doctor X. He peered over me with his arms neatly behind his back as if by touching me he was afraid he would get the AIDS Virus that bounced off the attendant's face mask.

(It was a wonder I didn't have to sign a HIPPA form about my privacy. Since I have to sign one to get my teeth cleaned it makes sense that the Feds would make it illegal to get emergency assistance unless I was protected against some kind of electronic surveillance. The crazy HIPPA laws show what happens when the Feds get ahold of something to "protect us".)

I asked, "Are you afraid I will sue you if you touch me?

"Well" , he said, "you never know what will happen." (That was a resounding "YES" to the uninitiated.)

"Oh" the flight attendant exclaimed, "the Federal 'Good Samaritan Law protects medical personnel from suits if they come to the aid of a passenger."

The Doc showed great surprise and said, "I did not know that. Give me the blood pressure cuff. Did you give him anything? Give him an aspirin..."

Isn't it nice that God got a nod here? The Good Samaritan story is remembered all over the earth. Nobody calls a law after an atheist or an ACLU suit to stop Docs from administering assistance. I am thankful that the traditions of my Saviour Jesus Christ, The Great Physician prevail around the world and the ill are treated with no fear of persecution.

More on this drama later.

Gary Sweeten

www.sweetenlife.com

The Wild Blue Yonder

Several years ago I had an experience that I never want to duplicate. While flying the friendly skies on a trip to Singapore with a stop in Japan, I had some strong pains in my chest and left arm. That is never a good sign.

I rang the call button and a nice lady appeared all smiles next to my seat on the plane. "Yes, May I help you sir?" she twittered sweetly. I am having severe chest pains" I replied. With a startled look she said in a panic stricken voice, "What did you say?" I repeated myself and she patted me on the arm and said, "Just wait right there. I'll be back in a few minutes."

That crazy comment provided some comic relief in the midst of an anxious time and I smiled while thinking, "Where would I go at 50,000 feet?" When she returned, however, her presence was even more ridiculous. A mask covered her face and rubber gloves were snugly protecting her hands. I felt like screaming, "I am having a heart attack. I am not coming down with AIDS!"

She was carrying a first aid kit and an oxygen bottle that she did not know what to do with so she plopped it on my lap and said, "Hold that for me." About then I heard the Captain announce over the squawk box that a doctor was needed immediately to treat a man in Business Class. My anxiety jumped several notches and I began to pray in the Spirit while wondering if I had done the right thing in telling her I was sick.

What happened next was a real miracle. God answered my arrow prayers and I began to feel much better. Tomorrow you will hear "the rest of the story!"

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

What About Getting A Coach?

I have always enjoyed sports and was actually a coach for some years. I was not a very good coach in most sports but was pretty good as a basketball coach. I liked BB a lot and played it myself. I studied BB and learned the basics enough to teach others.

There are some things that can not be taught to a player. No one could teach Tiger Woods to be so focused and competitive. It was in his DNA from birth. His father, Earl Woods, taught Tiger a lot as did other coaches but the internal drive to win was inside this young man all his life. In fact, Tiger brags that he constantly pushed Earl to let him practice more.

I am a professional Counselor/Coach/Consultant. A Counselor combines the ability to assess the strengths and weaknesses of a person with the gifts of healing, discernment and acceptance. A Counselor knows that something is broken and needs to be fixed. He or she also knows how to fix the broken things of life in the soul, relationships and how to deal effectively with guilt and shame.

A Coach is similar but focuses on fixing/healing broken hearts he focuses on getting people unstuck from ineffective living. I cannot give you the drive to succeed but I can help you understand your gifts and talents better as well as your opportunities for healing and growth. One of my gifts is Encouragement. Many of the people I Coach mention that they feel more confident after we meet. .

A Consultant adds the area of organizational development and system's thinking to Coaching. If the system is dysfunctional it will impede the people no matter how smart or skilled they are. A good Consultant is able to assess the places where the organizational system is stuck and then teaches the leaders how to push the right levers to get it moving again.

I love to meet with Christian leaders and assist them as a Counselor, Coach and a Consultant. Sweeten Life Systems has been called by God to "Heal the broken hearted and set the captives free." We sometimes do that one on one but we mostly work with leadership teams. How can we help you?

Gary Sweeten, Ed. D.

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

Go to Panera for Fellowship

Panera Bread is a great place to meet and have fellowship around the fireplace as we drink some tea or coffee and eat a roll, there is comfort and peace. I think we Christians all learn from Panera how to be a welcoming community.

People need to feel safe if they are to allow themselves to become open to God, self and others. Do strangers feel safe in your church fellowship?

Go to Panera for Fellowship

Panera Bread is a great place to meet and have fellowship around the fireplace as we drink some tea or coffee and eat a sweet roll. This afternoon Karen and I went out to Milford to get the kids from school while Julie and Dave celebrated Dave's birthday.

I needed to download a patch from the Internet but I did not have the password for Dave's WI FI and I was stuck. What could I do? I was frustrated for a few minutes before I remembered that there is a new Panera Bread in Milford and I jumped into my car and drove up to seek their free WI FI connection.

I stopped in front of the store and opened up my browser and was immediately rewarded with a connection. because it took so long I had to leave and pick up Lily from school but I returned to Panera and did my computing. while there I overheard two mature males discussing the Bible and Jesus. They carried on their chatting for thirty minutes and got up to leave, when I said, "sitting by the fire and discussing the Lord is pretty sweet isn't it?"

The two men stopped and we had a great little chat although we had never met before. With believers no formal introduction is needed and we exchanged cards, blog information and web addresses. The address for the leader's church is one I suggest you look up. http://www.prodigal180.com/ tells all about their vision and it seems very good to me.

Both of these men are Seasoned Believers who have served and followed God for many years. But now they are interested in getting off the "padded pews" and into some meaningful ministry.

I am fascinated by the numerous fellowships, groups and chatting societies that gather at Panera. Maybe we need to learn from the Bread Company how to develop an attractive space for people to gather.

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/

You Are Welcome

I will be speaking at morning services at Tri County Assembly of God in Fairfield, Ohio north of Cincinnati on the next two Sundays. I would love for you to be praying for me and the service as I speak about, "I'll Be Home for Christmas".

Senior Pastor Brad Rosenberg will be glad to meet my friends so if you are in the area, come out and say "Hello".

Gary Sweeten

http://www.sweetenlife.com/